Single mama conquers the Barbecue

Anyone who knows me well knows that I LOVE to cook & bake.  In fact, one of my secret dreams is to be a chef and to have my very own FOOD NETWORK show.

Over the past few years I have developed an affinity for The Art of Barbecue.  Let’s face it, I am no match for Bobby Flay when it comes to grilling, but whenever I get the chance to barbecue a meal I feel content.  I think it has something to do with the fact that BBQ-ing for me is connected to summertime and being outside. Once the snow comes, my trusty old barbecue goes into hibernation until spring returns.


For many years, prior to my divorce, I NEVER turned on the barbecue.  I would prep all of the food and then WAIT for the barbecue to be turned on for me and then happily cook.  I must admit that I was truly afraid of lighting a barbecue – it seemed out of my comfort zone and something that wasn’t in my realm of possibility.You may say that I was BBQ LIGHTING DEPENDENT!

BUT WHY????????

And then, three years ago, I found myself ALONE.  My husband had left, and it was just me, my daughters, my dog, and THE BARBECUE.

How was I ever going to grill a steak, hot dogs or burgers again???

I knew what I had to do.

So, I went to the dollar store, bought myself a new bright blue BBQ lighter, stepped out onto the balcony, and phoned my dad.  I remember the conversation.  I asked my father to stay on the phone with me while I attempted to light the BBQ.  I asked his advice on how to ensure that I would not light my eyebrows on fire in the process. I followed the very easy directions, and…


I DID IT!!!!

I got so excited that it had worked that I accidentally turned it off and closed the gas and had to start it again.

Boy did it feel like the world’s biggest accomplishment! 034

My daughters cheered for me and in that very moment, I truly knew that we would all be okay.  After all, a Single Mom who can light a barbecue is capable of doing ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING!

Since that day, 3 years ago, I have made many barbecues.  I still have the feeling of accomplishment every time I light it.  I have learned that being alone does not mean that you have to avoid doing things that feel scary.  It also doesn’t mean that you have to wait for someone to do things for you.

Single Motherhood has taught me to ask for help when I need it and to learn how to do things that I otherwise might not have done.  It’s a new adventure every single day, and I welcome all the challenges that come my way.

So, my advice to all you Single Mothers is to get outside, take a deep breath and light your barbecues!




  • Terri Wiseman
    Posted at 05:17h, 13 September Reply

    Looking forward to smelling your cooking again.

    • susan
      Posted at 09:11h, 13 September Reply

      Thanks Terri!!!!

  • Jodi
    Posted at 13:42h, 13 September Reply


    • susan
      Posted at 17:11h, 13 September Reply

      Thanks Jodi!

  • Amy
    Posted at 20:38h, 13 September Reply

    Hey Susan, love your blog! I too have conquered the BBQ in the last couple of years. It’s quite empowering, eh?

    • Susan
      Posted at 09:49h, 14 September Reply

      Hi Amy! I’m so happy that you enjoyed the blog! I love hearing that you also were able to conquer the BBQ, and that you felt empowered doing it. There is nothing greater than the feeling of accomplishment that comes from doing things that may be outside of our comfort zones. I hope you keep reading and enjoying the blogs!

  • Sheryl
    Posted at 23:12h, 16 September Reply

    Hi Susan,
    Great writing and so happy for you …..your strength and empowerment are wonderful examples to all. XO

  • Susan
    Posted at 16:42h, 17 September Reply

    Thanks for reading Sheryl! Glad you enjoyed the blog!!

  • Amy
    Posted at 21:57h, 28 October Reply

    I was driving somewhere last week that required me to take several highways and new routes. It was definitely outside of my comfort zone, and I found myself thinking of this blog and smiling. Thanks.

    • Susan
      Posted at 22:37h, 28 October Reply

      Hey Amy,
      I am so happy for you that you were able to accomplish something outside of your comfort zone. You must have felt so empowered!

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